Last week I found myself staring at my to-do list, wondering if there was any point attempting to tackle it at all. Three urgent deadlines, a washing pile taller than me, and — because why not — a last-minute email about costume day at school. Oh, and somewhere in there I was supposed to keep myself vaguely presentable, maybe even moisturised.
Sound familiar? That sense of being completely overwhelmed and trying to “do it all” — work, home, family, social life, self-care — all while keeping the Wi-Fi bills paid and your eyebrows plucked? It’s a modern epidemic, fuelled by constant notifications, comparison culture, and the glorification of being “busy.”
Somewhere along the line, we’ve forgotten that we’re not human doings, we’re human beings. Our lives, turned into piles of data in a constant quest for success that looks suspiciously like a dystopian productivity algorithm. No wonder that it often feels just too much.
But here’s the good news: you don’t have to keep sprinting on the hamster wheel. There are small things you can do to introduce peace and space to breathe into the rush. In this post I’ll share simple, research-backed tips to help when life feels overwhelming. Nothing complicated, nothing that requires a week-long retreat in Bali (although, yes please) — just practical, quick shifts that fit into everyday life.
Why Are We So Overwhelmed?
Almost every single person I talk to expresses feeling overwhelmed. It seems like the default modern condition. Overwhelm isn’t just about having a lot to do — it’s about the pressure we put on ourselves to do it all perfectly, all at once.
Modern life seems almost perfectly set up for it, due to things like:
- Multitasking as a default – it’s considered totally normal that we’ve all got too many browser tabs open (literally and metaphorically)
- Information overload – Emails, socials, WhatsApps, news alerts – everything is happening everywhere all at once – and we’re getting the notifications
- Sky-high expectations – We honestly believe we’re failing if we’re not ‘doing it all’ -and handling it with a smile
- Decision fatigue – From choosing what to cook for our evening meals, to which mascara to buy- the options are almost endless, and we’re spoilt for choice.
But it’s not just the onslaught of external stimuli that’s collectively pushing us over the edge. There’s a perfect storm at play. According to Simply Psychology, it’s the combination of internal pressures (perfectionism, anyone?) and external (work deadlines, childcare issues…) that combine to create overload mode.
Often, solving any of this feels like just another source of pressure, another problem to figure out. In these moments, my brain frequently just shuts down. I find that I can’t remember anything, and any input of information from others makes me irrationally angry.
Yet the antidote can be simpler than we think. Lately, I’ve really been making an effort to start my day off right, keep my choices simple, appreciate the little pleasures that make up daily joy, and give myself permission for some downtime.
10 Quick Fixes When You’re Feeling Overwhelmed
Here’s the bit you can skim when your brain is already fried. Save this list for those “I can’t cope” days.
Make Your To-Do List Shorter
Particularly among working mamas, it seems to have become a badge of honour to have a daily to do list that’s bursting at the seams. I’m saying that we need to keep it small and we need to keep it achievable. If, like me, your day also contains a lot of meetings, family admin and unexpected interruptions, overestimating what you can do in a single day is a recipe for feeling like an overwhelmed failure. Instead of ten tasks, pick your top three. That’s it – just three. You’ll feel far more productive (and far less guilty) when you actually tick them off. You can always add things if you’re really winning at life. But I keep a ‘brain dump’ list of incoming things, and then my daily to-do is a far more streamlined affair that I actually have a hope of achieving.
Try The 4-7-8 Breathing Trick
In the moment, when that horrible, buzzing feeling of overwhelm comes for you, you need to deal with the physical before you can get your thoughts straight. The answer comes back to calming your nervous system through that most basic of inputs – your breathing. Inhale for 4, hold for 7, exhale for 8. It’s a tiny reset and can calm spiralling thoughts in under a minute.
Give Yourself ‘Non-Doing’ Time
As Brené Brown says, downtime is essential. Sit with a coffee, stare out the window, do nothing. You’re not lazy — you’re recharging. Falling into the trap of thinking we have to be doing something every waking minute is a recipe for burnout. I’ve learned to cherish what I previously branded ‘laziness’. I’ll often set my alarm half an hour earlier than I need to – because I want to time to just sit and ‘be’, before the rush begins.
Declutter Your Digital Space
Mute, unfollow, delete. Information overload is real — curating your inputs makes space for your brain to breathe. I also have become a lot stricter about phone usage. It’s hard when we use those devices for everything from monitoring work to ordering the weekly shop. Those black mirrors are a comfort blanket and a distraction. I mean, how often do you sit down with Netflix and find you haven’t been paying attention because you ended up doomscrolling Insta at the same time? I now try really hard to limit the times I’m mindlessly defaulting to my phone. I use a Kindle to read books, I’m stricter on how often I check socials. I claim my time as my own. And a big part of that is leaving my phone in my bag.
Swap Multi-Tasking for Time Blocking
Eat without scrolling. Answer one email, not ten at once. Do one thing well, then move on. The funny thing is I’ve always been a bad multitasker anyway – despite the ‘common wisdom’ about how well women do it, which I could swear is actually just a trap to make us do more. Now I refuse. If I’m doing something, that’s what I’m doing until it’s done. I use my work calendar to back this up, blocking out time to complete important tasks or even just routine ones. Often I’ll book out a meeting room or go to a cafe on campus rather than sitting in my office, where everyone else’s pressing priority or random query becomes something I’m drawn into. I get so much more done, while feeling so much less overwhelmed.
Create a 5-Minute Beauty Reset Routine
Overwhelm thrives on decision fatigue. And if you’re a woman who likes to look and feel good, there are no end of choices to make before you’ve even left your bathroom in the morning. As much as I love makeup and skincare products, I’ve learnt to keep it extremely simple for the everyday. I have a very simple skincare routine that covers all the bases. My Trinny London stack streamlines my makeup right down. That and a multi-tasking Makeup For Ever pencil are literally all I need. Done.
Snack Before You Snap
Sometimes you’re not overwhelmed, you’re just hangry. A handful of nuts or a banana can be life-saving. I’m never out and about without a Moon Moon reusable snack pouch, which generally has an apple and a Nakd Protein Bar in it.
Step Outside for a Nature Reset
Even five minutes of fresh air can lower stress hormones. Bonus points if you leave your phone inside. I’ve gotten into the habit of taking short walks outside the office when I’m working, or slipping in an extra one taking the dog out in the evening.
Journal It Out
Write down the three things worrying you most. Then circle the one you can take action on today. The act of journaling doesn’t have to be time consuming. Sometimes it’s just about the act of writing down what’s churning in your head – be it a task or an emotional response to something. Writing it out is both cathartic and helps the brain to process it.
Create a Capsule Wardrobe
Another area where’s it’s super-easy to have too much choice is fashion. Now I love playing around with outfit combinations, but I’ve also found that keeping it as simple as possible during the working week is essential. My secret weapon is the bodysuit, and I love Commando and Zara for this. I have an endlessly rotating stack of sleeveless ones for summer and long sleeved for cooler months. I pair them with wide leg trousers, trainers and a knit or a blazer, or with a slip skirt for work. For play, I sub in jeans or a shorter skirt. And that’s it. No mystery, no complication. Just something I know works.
Learn To Say No Without Guilt
Every “yes” to someone else is a “no” to your own bandwidth. Start practising tiny no’s — they add up. I used to worry that refusing someone something would make them think I was a monster. But that’s so much nonsense. Most people don’t give us anywhere near as much headspace as we’d like to think. Learn to say no politely and go about your day.
When in doubt, simplify.
Final Thoughts
Here’s the truth: you don’t need to “do it all.” No one is actually managing that Instagram-perfect balance of career, family, wellness, and immaculate hair. And that’s okay.
Instead of pushing harder, try softer: shorter lists, simpler routines, more rest, fewer yeses. When overwhelm strikes, you’re not failing — you’re human.
So the next time you’re tempted to power through the chaos, try this instead: pause, breathe, choose one thing that matters, and let the rest wait.
Tell me — what’s your go-to trick when overwhelm hits? Leave a comment, I’d love to hear.
